Relationships everywhere in every space and every form are under pressure. The very essence of what keeps humans committed to one another, the basic level of respect and commonality, and purpose are being tested. Welcome to 2020, my friends. I could throw out a statistic to prove my point, but you need to look no further than the words plastered on the one thing we all seem to show complete devotion to nowadays- our technological devices. Newsfeeds, blogs, social media, op-eds, etc. by the nanosecond prove just how divisive our world is. And in many cases, this pandemic has revealed to us just how divided we are with our own families and even within our souls as we face limitations unlike any other time in recent years.
But it does not have to be this way. I am confident that the Creator of the Universe, who I recognize as Jesus has designed a blueprint within the fiber of our beings for us to be reconciled to God and one another. This is why we so yearn and hope for a better way, a better space, and a better experience no matter how bad it gets. I am living proof of this resilient hope and over the next several blogs I am going to present a series of writings that share deep insights I’ve gleaned about journeying towards unity through hardship.
The Backstory: I am a soon to be 36-year-old Christian wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, colleague, and lover of justice and people. There are many dimensions to who I am that you either know or will discover as you read these blogs. One thing I will start with is my marriage. Throughout the marriage, I’ve experienced some of the deepest pains and yet deepest joys of coming to understand the true essence of what unity is. I came into this union over 8.5 years ago with my goals, objectives, strategies, and game plan to accomplish the fantasy of what our marriage would and should be. While this ambition was fire, it was the wrong type of fire. It did not help to fuel our common purpose or even passion. The last few years have been a burning away of this me-centric perspective and a slow but powerful revelation of who I am, who my husband is, and who we are destined to become as what I like to call “Jameshan” a unionization of the two.
And that brings me to my first recognition:
Unity is oneness of heart, mind, and purpose.
What I have learned is that purpose for two isn’t a simple merging of two lives, two pathways, it is the birthing of something entirely new that yes includes elements of the two separate entities but it for sure is a new creation. This is why marriage my friends is so hard, because it is a letting go of your purpose for your marriage and a surrender to something that transcends both you and your spouse. I’ve already mentioned and will say so again that I believe God the Creator through Jesus is the binding force of this creation. And to be clear, I also believe marriage is His divine institution created to display the larger scope of His Glory. This is to say Jameshan is one person displaying one part of His glorious plan.
James and I have begun this blog to cultivate unity, to learn how to “move” in concert with one another. No doubt, over the course of 8.5 years of marriage, we have experienced joys, primarily our youthful daughter. And yet we know that if we want to fully realize the potential of our common purpose here on earth as a unit, there are so many things that will need to be mended, addressed, and reconciled. And while that thought alone often fast paces my mind to a place of “giving up”, the endurance that has kept me in this race is fueled by the recognition that common purpose can foster soil to produce oneness.
Until next time, would you join us as we ponder?
Is it possible to have a common purpose with someone while also having vastly different approaches towards the shared mission? If so, how? Leave us a comment, drop a line, and welcome to our journey towards perfect love.