Almond Joy is Nasty. Why I Still Have a Taste for it Though.

Almond Joy is Nasty

Great things come in small packages…except Almond Joy…I mean…I might grow to like it but nah. Almond Joy is that type of candy made for uppity folks whose products blew up because of a classist bubble. It’s like coming up with Matador’s to compete with Slim Jim’s; like comparing Rich Homie Quan with Slum Village. All the people who takes sides make cheap shots en masse, and pay lip service to preserve their livelihood. Personally, if I had to eat crap, I’d gamble with Hershey Kisses…don’t mind me, I’m just clowning around here. 

FUN FACT: The 50’s marked the golden era of manufacturing candy in Boston, MA. There was a certain candy called ‘Tweet’, that was produced on Confectioner’s Row in Cambridge.

– New England Historical Society  

Almighty Amuser

For all the heathens reading this blog let’s set the record straight so you don’t get the wrong idea; I tell bad jokes. What can I say? I’m a Dad after all, what do you expect? Now just because my oil may be crude, it doesn’t mean I don’t have a moral compass or respect traditional values. Jesus made friends with sinners, convicted them so that they would be fit to dwell in His kingdom. Understood?

I see you girl with all that jelly/
Thug the right way you can get in my belly/
Peanut butter with whipped cream/
You butter pray, Jiffy got something to parry/

Heathen, there is a reason for such hedonistic suggestions. Let me make it plain, I’m trying to turn your attentions to Christ.

6 it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, BUT rejoices in the truth. 1 Cor 13:6 ESV *emphasis added*

A Full Moon

I never really got into astrology and there’s a part of me that rejects it as its merely divination, (I know, I just threw away my player card right there). Speaking of which, have you checked out AstroBae on Twitter? This girl gotta whole cult following – of women at that – that she gives her reading to however many times in the week. Got me thinking to myself, “man if I was born yesterday, I’d think I’m looking at heaven looking at these tweets”. Miss I hope you’re not taking offense. There’s nothing but pure love here. On one hand, you can look at astrology and Tarot reading as forms of Divination. By contrast, the pseudoscience can be redeemed through Christ. Can the heavens and other terrestrial objects influence the ways of man?

12 Again Jesus spoke to them, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in the darkness, BUT will have the light of life.” Jn 8:12 ESV *emphasis added*
15 You are the light of this world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Mat 5:15 ESV

Ain’t nothing like being a JedEye who knows both sides of the force. 

Twin Flame

Have you ever met your Doppelganger? Apparently I have plenty. And way too many of them are psychos. 

TRUE STORY: Back when I was in Boston and I had my locs, I got stopped twice in one day by the cops. They were looking to arrest some guy – get this – who looked like me. Now after stopping me twice I was bugging because we know how police interactions go for Black Men in America. So I told them, “I think you got the wrong guy.” Then they showed me the sketch of the man they was looking for…and wouldn’t you know it? This guy really LOOKED like me! So now my hair is lifting off of my skin like Einstein and my mind is racing. I’m thinking to myself, “These cops are so racist that they will sit here, draw a sketch of you just so they have reason to arrest you.”. I said again, “No guys I really think you have the wrong guy.” And one of the cops gave me relief, “If you see this guy, let us know. He’s much TALLER than you.” 

-… ..- … … .. -. –.
-… ..- … … .. -. –.
-… ..- … … .. -. –.
-… ..- … … .. -. –.
Go figure.

How to Optimize your Joy?

Joy is not the same thing as happiness. Happiness comes and goes while joy is the state of happiness. Happiness comes and goes while joy is the state of happiness. Now if we as Christians are going to store pure worship in the Church, we’re going to have to look to Jesus as we subscribe to His teachings. To possess full joy, we must recognize that Christ is the objective (goal) and the inductive (cause) of our happiness.

NEW YORK, NY – OCTOBER 17: Chris Brown performs onstage during TIDAL X: Brooklyn at Barclays Center of Brooklyn on October 17, 2017 in New York City. (Photo by Kevin Mazur/Getty Images for TIDAL)
Christopher Brown – One Bad Bass Player
Plyometrics for Football Athletes
  1. Smile – Both in your heart and in those beautiful lips of yours. Show some teeth. Oooh wee I see you out here serving face! You’re absolutely stunning! By the way, I’m practicing this in the mirror myself. Why should you smile in your heart? Well you won’t always find yourself in situations where you can physically smile, and sometimes it’s inappropriate to show those pearly whites when empathizing with another. 
  2. Affirm your happiness – I will be happy Today. The joy of the LORD is my strength; my defense in the adversities of life. He has made me glad! When we talk to ourselves, we build determination while speaking to our subconscious. Just don’t have any raggedy conversation with yourself in public. People may find you looney. 
  3. Laugh – Especially if you do this after talking to yourself! People are gonna be looking at you like, “Man that person must be on some Hyaluronic Acid, HA HA HA!” I have to admit it, this comes unnatural to me. Typically something must be funny enough for me to laugh. My best advice here is find that one thing that is supremely funny and learn to laugh. Just don’t be a sadist ok?
  4. Sing – Now this is more up my alley. Singing can do wonders for the soul, whether you’re singing silly songs, doing karaoke, or creating your own songs. Make melodies as if you’re singing with the birds. Sing as if your song wakes up plants and fertilizes the ground. Hopefully you’ll be moved just like I am.
  5. Dance – If you’re not the person who would bust a move for NO reason – I mean – no reason; no music, in the middle of the night, no pajamas, at the gas station; while working out at the gym, we probably can’t hang. You don’t have to be Chris Brown here, you just need to groove. This is probably a good time to note that being joyful is a workout – in and of – itself. Dancing becomes more wonderful once you realize God is dancing with and in you.
  6. Shout – Feel like screaming don’t you? If not remember we’re consolidating these exercises and not merely compartmentalizing them. Alot of positivity should be built up at this point. Let it loose!!! Don’t forget to shout from your heart as well lest you do your voice damage. I don’t know about you, but I feel a detox of bad energy already! Go ahead…AAAAAAHHHHHHHH.
  7. Lift up – Your hands; your heart, your soul; your eyes. Remember your surroundings can only have an effect on your inner being if you let it. 

    5 Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again – my Savior & my God. Ps 43:5 NLT

    This is the type of work that is useful for battling depression. This isn’t to say that you will always win in bouts, it’s just a strategy you can use when difficult days approach. 
  8. Exult – which we mean in two ways: 
    – leaping for joy
    – vigorously bringing everything to it’s full compacity

    Leaping for joy is just as much as a workout as dancing. In fact, plyometrics are practiced by athletes to build explosive performances. I couldn’t recommend this to those who are overweight, or advanced in age. It could also be a nuisance if you’re well endowed…ah hem…just saying. Take whatever precautions you need to do this physically, just remember affirming these things with your heart and lips are an option too.

With a JoyStick

You see what we’ve done here? We created a standard of procedure or standard of operations (SOP). Such lists are important when developing a business. A business can scale well when certain systems are put in place. Did you also notice that the list only has personal actions? There aren’t any additional equipment or personnel needed to excel in this process. It’s good when you’re self-developing to not have to depend on outside sources. This is also useful when you need to take on additional projects for an enterprise. If one project falls through, it should not disrupt the main flow of your business. 

2 Then the LORD answered me: “Write the vision; make it plain on tablets, so he may run who reads it. Hab 2:2 ESV

Adopt the practice into your life however you see fit; that’s consistent with your abilities and your schedule. Beat your high score!!!

Nastydamus

Because the time is coming O Mario, when such exultations will shake the Earth; when people are at the verge to evolve due to the deposits of virtue in their life. Of course there will be those who will ascend through practicing vices, but they will not get far. Remember Christ is the objective and the inductive of our joy. And as long as we find our delight in Him, we’ll find ourselves living a prosperous and pleasurable life.

Thou shalt not/
Thou shalt not/
Thou shalt not/
Thou shalt not/
Not tied to the mitzvah/
Missed me with that sugar/
Peeps ready to embark/
Discount with a coupon/
Upset that we’re trekking/
Tekken hits with Marshall Law/
Thou shalt not/
Ten shuffled with a deck a log/
Thou shalt not/
Ninjas in a half shell/
Shotgun with my wife Belle/
Give me life, this Renaissance’s ill/
Thou shalt not/
Thou shalt not/
Let me clean you up Pukkas/
Thou shalt not/
Thou shalt not/
Poker face you can be my cougar/

So what will we do? Are we willing to become more happy unconditionally as this year unfolds? This work may seem more complicated than it needs to. In reality, breaking things down and practicing them is God’s way of disciplining us so we will become more like Him. Why should we spend so much time trying to be happy? Well, I’d say it’s more than just being happy. As the old cliche goes, virtue is it’s own reward. 

Just how big of a reward virtue brings? That depends on how well versed you are in relativity…I will say this: When I was growing up in church, there was a simple song we would always sing in the morning that had a few verses to it:

Joy is mine! Joy is mine! Joy today is mine! I told Satan to get thee behind. Joy today is mine!

And as we dig through the depths of our souls, may we begin to store our treasures in heaven, and not on the earth. God Bless you and until next time. I love you.

Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!

-Phil 4:4 BSB

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